Hide the bunny rabbits and red hair dye. The psychos are out in full force on Wisteria Lane.

Actually, the word “psycho” doesn’t just apply to Nora and Orson, though they are king and queen of Psycholand. I’d label Lynette and Carlos with that term as well.

Nora made her move on Tom during his lowest moment, a few hours after he was let down by Lynette, who said the place he leased for his pizza parlor was not a good idea. Noticing a chance, she visited the restaurant with lots of wine and a low-cut dress. Shortly after, she was kissing Tom, who shot down Nora’s advances. Her response was to walk away saying, “You led me on. You shouldn’t have done that,” then shoving Tom and walking away with an evil penetrating look. It’s “Fatal Attraction Part 2.”

Another of Orson’s secrets came to light, thanks to Carolyn’s persistence to bring down Orson for killing his former wife. I’ve never been in the ladies’ room, but do women usually slip abuse photos to other women in between brush-ups with the lipstick? Bree probably noticed that Orson’s “missing” wife was a redhead, and we also saw that Dominique, the woman lying in the morgue, was also a redhead. If I were Bree, I’d consider an impulse to go brunette.

Speaking of Dominique, Mike finally remembered that he knew her, and I can finally say I am grateful to Edie for showing up wearing next to nothing. Her sexy nurse’s outfit triggered a memory of Dominique doing the same thing. It’s only a matter of time before he remembers his connection with Orson.

In the Solis household, Gaby found a contract in a locked drawer that mentioned a $2 million job waiting for Carlos to accept it. Faster than you can say “new diamond earrings and matching necklace,” Gaby tried to slow down the divorce so she could still be married to Carlos when he accepted the job. So she did the only thing she knew to keep Carlos in her life: She seduced him. And after Carlos got what he wanted, he told Gaby that the contract was a fake. He made it because he knew the thought of money would get him in Gaby’s underwear.

So the divorce is still on, and in a big way. Gaby couldn’t take the fact that she didn’t have the upper hand, and shoved Carlos so hard that he crashed through the bedroom window and fell into the bushes. I was pretty sure Carlos was alive, so I spent about a minute wondering where Gaby got the strength to push a man twice her size so hard that he would break through a window.

Yeah, don’t worry. Carlos is alive. And with glass still embedded in him, he pledges to kick up the war a notch.

Knowing that Mike and Edie were getting closer (and seeing the two of them in one of the Kama Sutra’s best positions) Susan decided to make a move on Sir Ian McCutie. And she made her declaration of love only the way Susan could: She showed up to his party drunk and threw up in front of an editor she had a chance to impress.

I was real happy that Susan and Ian ended the episode in each other’s arms … until I remembered that Ian is married to a woman in a coma. I’m sure that coma is bound to end just when things get serious.

Now, back to Lynette, the episode’s No. 1 psycho. But I mean “psycho” in a good way. Tom told his wife that Nora came on to him at the restaurant. Lynette kicked in Nora’s door and was set to knock the crap out of her. I was ready for a WWE Smackdown, but Kayla walked in the room. Lynette had no choice but to turn the fight from physical to verbal.

She threatened Nora with a spinal beating if she comes within a block of her home. Amazing how Felicity Huffman can turn around to Kayla with that housewife face and remind the girl to bring her swimsuit next weekend. Classic Lynette. I think I already recommended a previous episode for Felicity’s Emmy submission, but this one was her best yet.

With November sweeps here (officially starting Thursday), things are going to step up on our favorite shows as they try to get viewers to tune in (and pump up advertising dollars). Next week a couple of the Housewives will be trapped in a hostage situation at a grocery store, brought on by Carolyn. I’m guessing she found out that her husband had an affair with Dominique. I would imagine there are better ways to work out her anger. Maybe a punching bag. Or pills. Even a kick to her husband’s groin would be better than waving a gun around.

Someone’s supposed to die or be injured. Any bets on who it is?

“Desperate Housewives” airs at 8 Sundays on ABC.