Our four Housewives took trips to get away from the insanity of their lives, only to find that their troubles were never going away.
Bree was minutes away from a fantastic trip in the Bahamas when she saw her son Andrew on TV, dirty and bruised and not really looking to come home. But Bree tracked him down and found out that Andrew has changed. Of course, he’s hustling on the street for change, but he’s managed to find a nice “home” with a comfortable couch. Orson’s surprise visit to Andrew turned things around on both fronts. First, Orson actually showed genuine compassion. I didn’t know he had it in him, to say he really cared for Bree. This whole time I imagined he was trying to tighten the leash. And when Andrew came home, it got a little personal for me and I missed a little bit of the end.
But not the part where Mike .. Wakes … UP! And it was Edie who found out the hard way (if you saw the show, you got that pun). Meanwhile, Susan was letting her guard down and becoming the second woman Sir Ian McCutie has ever had sex with. There’s something sweet about a man who’s been with only one woman, but I imagine that he always wanted to try different pastures, judging by the dozen condoms he packed in his bag for his weekend trip with Susan.
And Lynette had to cut her spa weekend short when Tom threw his back out, resulting in an eight-hour drive with Nora, Psychopath Extraordinaire. Though this storyline is growing stale, I can take it because it’s only bringing Tom and Lynette closer.
The best storyline had Gabrielle reuniting with John the gardener, who now has money to go along with his rippling abs. It’s good to see Jesse Metcalf back, even if just for one show. I’m sure he needed the money after “John Tucker Must Die” tanked at the box office, and it was a great way to turn the tables on Gabrielle, who didn’t think it was bad that she was the single woman having an affair with John, engaged to a hotel heiress. And the best moment of the season had Gabrielle escaping from said heiress by hiding in John’s suitcase. My husband didn’t think Gaby could fit in such a small bag. “Have you seen her lately?” I said. True enough, there was Gaby crawling out of the bag to deliver a classic one-liner to an unsuspecting couple (“I saved a bundle on airfare.”). Props to Eva Longoria for actually doing the stunt.
Maybe now that John gave her the cold shoulder, she’ll realize that Carlos deserves a second chance. But will Carlos even listen?
“Desperate Housewives” airs at 8 Sundays on ABC.